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What's up with morbid jealousy!

Relationships are often complicated. At the beginning of a relationship, everything is rosy, the chemicals of love are in full swing and we feel invaded by positive feelings. However, and depending on some circumstances that we will try to explain, it is common to see how many couples deteriorate and even break up due to a very common problem: jealousy.

What is jealousy?

In the field of couple relationshipsJealousy is a feeling of insecurity and anguish that invades one or both members of a romantic couple. when a series of situations occur. This negative feeling can arise when they feel that the other person's love is in danger, or when they notice with fear that they are no longer the center of attention of the loved one.

By extension, All interpersonal relationships can be affected by jealousy.We can find examples of jealousy situations that occur even in adult life: “my mother spends more time with my sister, she has always been the favorite” or “my best friend asked another person out even though I was her best friend.”

As we see, not all jealousy comes from romantic partners, But it is true that it is much more common among boyfriends.In fact, jealousy is a recurring problem in couples' psychological consultations.

The Side Effects of Jealousy (and How to Deal with It)

Situations like this can occur much more frequently than we imagine, generating feelings of anger, irritability and rivalry between the parties involved. Sometimes we use wrong ways to reinforce our sense of worth, and we also have a certain difficulty in accepting the presence of other sources of gratification (that are not us) in the life of that loved one. They are elements that can generate the necessary breeding ground for jealousy to arise..

However, these situations are usually, in most cases, resolved without major complications, since it is assumed that in adulthood a series of problems have developed. emotional tools which allow these unpleasant feelings to be channelled towards more adaptive responses. Most people are able to put this feeling into perspective and put it into context, but there are others who, for one reason or another, are overcome by the feeling of discomfort caused by jealousy, without being able to control it.

The good side of jealousy

It is worth mentioning that, sometimes, Jealousy can be usefulIs this possible? Yes, because in certain situations jealousy can trigger an alarm in our mind in case we are experiencing real situations that require a series of actions to guarantee the stability of the relationship with that loved one. For example, jealousy can be a sign that something is happening, and that perhaps there is a third person who is really getting involved in our love relationship.

Jealousy would thus be an advantage when it comes to making certain reasonable doubts present in our decision-making and not making us act blindly out of the love or affection we feel towards the other person. However, it should be noted that jealousy alone does not guarantee that we will judge what happens to us in a rational manner: other capacities are needed for this.

When are they harmful?

Are jealousy potentially harmful to our emotional well-being? In general, These feelings manifest themselves in an uncontrolled manner, are irrational, without objective foundation and therefore, harmful.. These are the morbid jealousy, those that can really destroy interpersonal relationships, and those that pose a problem for the psychological well-being of the person who suffers from them.

Unfortunately, There is a mistaken belief that when a person feels jealous of their loved one, it is because they love them very much.This is a huge mistake that can create dangerous dynamics and make the situation worse. In fact, it is easy to hear phrases like: “if he feels jealous of you, it is because he is very much in love.” This type of conception about jealousy can be a bad start for a relationship, because love between a couple must be sown freely to allow both members to grow and flourish; jealousy only suffocates the relationship, to the point of making it unbearable.

The signs that warn us that someone is jealous

Below are listed The most common symptoms that indicate that we are dealing with someone who suffers from morbid jealousyHowever, it is worth emphasizing the fact that people who experience these feelings live with a lot of pain most of their days. 

Jealousy is a serious problem that may require the intervention of a mental health professional. People often recognize their problem to themselves, but find it extremely difficult to admit it to others and, consequently, refuse to receive help. This can prevent them from breaking out of the negative spiral.

10 signs and symptoms of jealous people

  • They check the phones of their loved ones (partner, family) constantly, as well as their personal accounts (Facebook, e-mail, etc.).
  • They distrust their coworkers, both men and women.
  • They do not look favorably on their partners doing personal activities pleasant.
  • They assume that their partners dress up and put on makeup to please them. to other people.
  • They carefully check their partners' clothes looking for other people's marks or smells.
  • They assume that personal purchases made by their partners are gifts towards other people.
  • They deprive their partners of enjoying spaces with other people, even if they have the opportunity to accompany them.
  • They criticize, humiliate, scold and devalue constantly to their partners.
  • They tend to have a rude attitude and arrogant.
  • They ridicule their partners in front of other people.

The need to overcome this problem

People who experience jealousy to an excessive degree feel fear, anxiety, sadness, stress, and even physical pain as a result of their lack of trust. They may even feel uneasy about life. 

But It is necessary to insist that jealousy problems can be overcome by consulting an appropriate professional. This emotional situation can be remedied.