image

MANAGING THE EGO

BEING HAPPY DEPENDS ON YOU

We are all endowed with an ego as a fundamental aspect of being human; many times, it governs a large part of our decisions in daily life and helps us maintain balance, strengthen our personality and, why not say it, achieve many of our successes.

It reinforces our competence, helps us overcome disagreements and keeps us alert to situations that we sometimes don't know how to handle; it also, to a large extent, defines various aspects of our behavior.

Without going into psychological or scientific matters, the ego can be very useful on a daily basis, but it can also cause us many problems.

Perhaps these problems I am talking about are not related to other people; however, introspectively, they can even cause health problems, such as stress, high blood pressure, depression and insomnia, among others.

A person who does not manage his ego with a good dose of humility tends to have an exaggerated opinion of himself; indeed, as they say, he thinks too much of himself, but not always in a positive sense.

That is to say, for him or her there are no middle grounds or grey areas, things are all or nothing, or they believe that they are the walking goodness and that they do and give everything for others – and, of course, nobody thanks them for anything – on the contrary, they resort to the whip whenever they can, flaunting how cursed they are for some common mistake they have made.

These people have an exaggerated opinion of themselves for one thing or another and, of course, they perceive and demand the same from others.

CAUSE OR SYNDROME

The ego can also cause the navel of the world syndrome; that is, we believe that everything revolves around us, that if someone makes a bad face, they automatically turn it against us even if they don't even know our name; it makes us see Moors with pitchforks, as they say.

Another characteristic is that it makes us think that we are the only person in the entire universe to whom bad things happen, of course, and that often they are not so bad, but with that negative thought one turns them into tremendous Greek tragedies.

With that big ego, who wouldn't want to jump off a pedestrian bridge?

Pride is an element that is always closely linked to the ego and that, generally, has its roots in anger. We think that the world is attacking us, we get angry and pride jumps out and we get angry and pride jumps out and prevents us from seeing that perhaps we were the first to attack (if that were the case).

It may be that we have never been aggressive before, and yet we were attacked without reason; in any case, when pride takes over, it makes us take things personally and suffer, when it may be much easier to get out of it by forgiving or simply set a limit and turn the page.

Ego and pride cause a lot of suffering in human beings. When we realize it, we have already spent weeks, even months, wallowing in brutal resentment.

There are so many therapies, dynamics and absurd methods to reduce the ego, they are all temporary measures, some work and others not so much, but what really works is daily work with oneself.

TO OVERCOME IT

First, take into account that we are just one more person among the billions in the world and although misery loves company, there are surely more serious problems than those that afflict you. Then, identify why we are angry, why we suffer, to put things in perspective and make our existence easier. Forgive ourselves and forgive others.

Seek humility in what we do and also acknowledge our mistakes and try to repair them as much as possible. Help others from the heart without expecting anything in return.

Difficult tasks that are done little by little, but that have immediate results.