
Getting away from me gives you peace
Part of my emotional responsibility, when I love another person, is to give the person I love the freedom to distance themselves, because perhaps my person is hurting them. And that distance will allow them to heal.
Write me what you think. I'd love to read you.
Everyone on social media is talking about how we need to stay away from toxic people who hurt us.
But are you able to accept that sometimes, it's you the one who does the harm in the relationship?
It really requires a great effort of humility and reading of raw reality, to realize how we are the ones who are causing harm in the relationship. Sometimes because we are intense, other times because we are distracted, other times because we are selfish or controlling.
The issue is not whether I do harm intentionally or unintentionally; the issue is the harsh reality, the issue is that I am causing harm and injury to the people I love.
When I realize that I am the one who is causing harm, this becomes an act of love. And what follows is inviting the other person to move away from me, in order to heal.
It is healthy to allow the other person to take some distance to heal, to heal wounds and decide if it is good for them or not. And after healing, to leave them free to decide if they are in a position to return to having a relationship with me.
Loving another person also means inviting him or her to distance yourself when I am the one who is hurting him or her.
I would love to read you, tell me what you think about this.
Thanks for reading, don't forget to share and follow me on social media.
– Dr Roch