{"id":3718,"date":"2020-05-02T00:03:00","date_gmt":"2020-05-02T00:03:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/drroch.mx\/?p=3718"},"modified":"2020-05-02T00:03:00","modified_gmt":"2020-05-02T00:03:00","slug":"razones-por-las-que-las-parejas-deciden-divorciarse","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/drroch.mx\/en\/razones-por-las-que-las-parejas-deciden-divorciarse\/","title":{"rendered":"There are many reasons for getting divorced."},"content":{"rendered":"

Couples considering the possibility of divorce<\/a> They often turn to therapy as a last desperate attempt to save their marriage.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The American edition of The Huffington Post<\/em> has spoken to several marriage therapists to resolve some doubts on the subject and, specifically, on the reasons that women usually have when they decide to divorce. These are their conclusions:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

1. They feel undervalued and overly responsible for the relationship.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

For a marriage to work, both parties have to be present. It requires attention, effort, intention and communication. At the end of the day, many people evaluate everything they do for the family and wonder where their partner has been, explains Kristin Davin<\/a>, a psychologist based in New York.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cThere are many women who feel like they are carrying the entire weight of the relationship, that they are doing most of the emotional work and that they are constantly having to find new things to keep the relationship alive,\u201d she adds. \u201cThey get frustrated when they don\u2019t receive the same consideration in return. Over time they end up saying, \u2018why bother? \u2019\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Therefore, \u201cthe key ingredient for a healthy marriage is communication,\u201d he says. Christine Wilke<\/a>, Pennsylvania marriage therapist.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

2. They always argue about the same thing with their partner.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Many couples<\/a> People who go through marriage counseling have been arguing for years about the same things. When needs are repeatedly not met, mutual resentment builds up (a factor that is deadly to a relationship), she says. Olga Bloch<\/a>, a marriage and family therapist from Maryland.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWhen someone feels like they are unable to make changes, you start to hear statements like, \u2018You never listen to me,\u2019 or \u2018Your apologies are empty and mean nothing,\u2019\u201d Bloch explains. \u201cEventually, this person gives up on the relationship and starts looking for a way out, because moving on is no longer an option.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

3. They are dissatisfied with their sex life.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

For most couples, sex is a good barometer for measuring the health of a relationship. When they complain about their sex life<\/a>, there are usually more problems outside the bedroom, Davin argues.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cIf you feel sexually frustrated in your marriage, you feel emotionally depleted and drained,\u201d she says. \u201cSometimes the question is: Can partners be affectionate without it always leading to sex? Sexual intimacy can easily become an issue that creates divisions in a marriage.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

4. They don't talk or connect emotionally with their partner like before.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

According to Wilke, many people who have been married for a while consider divorce because they no longer feel emotionally connected to their partner.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cI would say it is the number one reason women decide to end their marriage,\u201d she says. \u201cThis particular problem makes an unhappy woman much more vulnerable to having a affair<\/em> \u201cand look for that connection elsewhere.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

5. They have matured more than their partners.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

It's inevitable that both partners will mature individually over the course of a relationship. This becomes a problem when they grow apart and one partner resists reconnecting, says Texas psychologist Anne Crowley.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cMarriages change and evolve, especially if they have children,\u201d Crowley explains. \u201cOften, it is the woman who encourages her partner to go to therapy to bridge the gap. If he resists, it leads to a dead end: the woman does not want to keep repeating the same toxic behaviors and he wants things to stay the same.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

6. There comes a point where divorce is the only way to look after yourself again.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Sometimes long-standing problems (such as addictions or uncontrolled anger) push couples over the edge, she notes. Winifred Reilly<\/a>, a marriage and family therapist from California.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWhat I hear over and over again is that they would rather end their marriage than face another day, another week, or another year with their partner and problems that never get better.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

After putting up with this behavior for a while, many people realize that they do not deserve to live in tension and disappointment day in and day out.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cSometimes, despite love, commitment and efforts to keep the marriage alive, people reach a point of no return and decide to separate,\u201d Reilly admits.<\/p>\n\n\n\n